I just realized that I cannot cannot stand people humming at the office!!! ARGH!! It is sooooooo bloody irritating when you’re trying to concentrate on work!!!

…of a good holiday! Hmph!

Trust me to catch the flu bug on the week of Raya. Sleep, sleep, and more sleep was all I got during the past 5 days.

Sigh… I hate being sick

~~~~~

Being back in the office has dumped me right smack in the middle of all these colleagues whom I’ve never met before.

So the other day, while I was minding my own business and doing my work at my workstation, I heard a loud voice floating out of the room near where I was sitting.

“How could she… She’s just covering her @$$…”
“I didn’t have the heart to yell at her then but…”
“She better not let me catch her getting in after 9 and leaving before 5…”

This went on for like, hours, it seemed to me. And it was so distracting coz the office is normally quiet and you can’t help overhearing coz heck, it was l.o.u.d!

From what I could gather, one of the higher-uppers had some issue with one of the consultants and was ranting to a colleague.

This same person repeated the same rant to another higher-upper the very next day at the pantry, which also happened to be near my workstation.

ok, everyone rants. That’s fine. But if you want to rant about someone, please do so in private because I happen to think that it is very rude to talk such things about someone in the presence of others who have no business hearing it even though names were not mentioned. And not to mention distracting when we are trying to work.

And this business about yelling? If there’s one thing I detest in my first job and my current job is that I’ve seen and heard of cases where people get yelled at for the work that they do due to whatever reasons. I mean, c’mon! Regardless of the work done, we are all working professionals and should maintain that professionalism in the way we treat our staff and colleagues. If we can treat our clients like kings and queens, why should we treat our own staff, the people who are doing the actual hard work, like shit? And then we wonder why the attrition rate is so high! Sheeesh…

Gawd help me not to ever be assigned to this person’s project! PLEASE!

Just give me a break… can’t even be sick in peace!

Getting fed up with the direction-less way this is heading.

Not that I haven’t done anything to prod it into some direction.

If someone doesn’t make a decision soon, I think I’m gonna do something drastic.

Hmph!

Seriously!!! How can someone who is running a service business :

1.  Tell customer NO, this cannot be done, that cannot be done, without offering any alternative solution when the fault was his/hers (the business person) to begin with.
2. Talk sarcastically to the customer, like we were intentionally being difficult when all we wanted is to ensure that our end product is as per our specifications.
3. Act like everything that was not right was due to the customer’s fault, which it wasn’t.
4. Deny that one of the requirements was even mentioned when it was spelled out a FEW times when the order was placed.
5. Dare to bitch about the customer in front of the customer like we were stupid enough NOT to know they were bitching about us.
6. Dare to even think that we are stupid enough to just take the product and close the deal with all its wrong specifications.

I am so bloody pissed!! GAAAAAHHH!!

Which part of ‘service’ industry do they not understand??? I am so shocked that people can actually run a business like that!! I.am.seriously.shocked!!!

WTF???!!!!!

AAAARRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!

So each person I spoke to during the crucial period stressed the fact that I’d be surrounded by SMART people.

I was quite puzzled with the amount of emphasis they put on SMART people. I mean, so are they saying that everyone in that place is SMART while others who are not, aren’t? Does SMART mean superior to others? What? What exactly did they mean?

Up to this day, I don’t get their fixation on SMART people. Sure, SMART people may have an edge when it comes to proposing solutions. But what else?

Recently, we had an event. So the MC was talking and this person who was sitting at my table was jabbering away (which I thought was quite rude). Then this person remarked about the MC “stop babbling already!” in a not-so-soft voice. I was extremely annoyed by this because the MC, who’s a newbie, was clearly trying her best to be an effective MC in front of about 200 people.

Which got me thinking. Smart people aren’t all that if they don’t have the courtesy to shut up when someone is speaking in front of the audience. Smart people are nothing if they can’t treat others with respect. Intelligence will only take you so far; if you’re not a good person inside, then you won’t go very far. That’s my philosophy anyway.

So yeah… so what if you’re SMART?? I’m not impressed.

I always try to own up to my mistakes as soon as I realize that I’ve made one. Especially in my line of work where time is of essence and relates directly to cost, it just doesn’t pay to cover up or hide something that has gone wrong coz sooner or later, it will come bite you in your ass.

Sometimes, my mouth moves faster than my mind. I’ve said things that I wished I hadn’t after the fact. But what to do? I’m just human, after all. Just have to do damage control after and try not to make the same mistake twice. But every situation is different and there’s no knowing nor predicting one’s actions when in a particular situation.

Some while ago, I said something that I shouldn’t have but which I had believed was true at that time. Anyway, I tried to rectify things by explaining myself and I thought all was fine after. Only later did I find out that it was otherwise; the said person was telling others one side of the story but not explaining the other. Which got me very pissed coz (1) I did try to make amends; and (2) the said person had also earlier said something which was the total opposite of how the said person reacted, so in other words, did the same thing I did.

I don’t get it. How come you yell bloody murder when someone else does something that you think is wrong, but it’s ok when you do it? Quite unfair, ain’t it? I’m quite fine if one doesn’t want to speak to me ever again coz of what I did but s/he must admit what s/he had done as well because the way I see it, we both did the same thing. It’s only fair.

I know some people think I’m a total b*tch (sorry to the female dogs, dont’t mean to insult them) for what I did but those people are not my friends so I couldn’t care less. But it just bugs me that only one side of the story was heard and I’m the one who’s in the bad light. But I’m not one who’d go around telling all and sundry about my personal stuff so I just have to stuff it and deal with it.

Unfortunately, injustice just disgusts me to no end.

Hmph.

~~~~~

I’m actually a very considerate person to dislike. If I don’t like a person, I’d try my level best to stay far far away from the person. If I happen to see you at the mall, I’d pretend that I didn’t notice you and walk the other direction (but then again, this is a bad example coz I’m quite oblivious to other ppl when I’m at the mall so if this does happen, please don’t automatically assume that I don’t like you coz I’m just a blur sotong ). But in situations that force us into close proximity, I will try my level best not to have anything to do with you. I won’t say anything in reference to you. I’ll even switch stations if the song/artiste you like plays on the radio coz I don’t want to be reminded of you. In essence, I want you out of my life and would do almost anything to achieve that.

Good right? I’m doing all the work to avoid you so you don’t have to do anything.

I know… I’m irrational and strange but aren’t we all in some way or other?

First, it was the 41% fuel price hike.

As if the day couldn’t get worse, I had to go and hit my car against someone’s butt. And it was MY stupid freaking fault!! Thank gawd the guy’s car was merely scratched and he was nice enough to let it go so I didn’t have to compensate him.

But my car needs to be fixed.

GGGGRRRRPPHHHH!!!

I.am.so.bloody.exhausted!!

Work, work, company events, annual dinner rehearsals, dance class, errands, work…

My allergies are bothering me but I can’t seem to find the exact trigger. It seems to flare up whenever it feels like it.

I’m shedding my hair at an alarming rate. Been told it could be stress (I don’t feel significantly stressed out), change in hormones (?), sign of getting older (arrrgghh!).

Gawd, I so need a break.

o_O

Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. ~Calvin (Hobbes’ buddy)~

I guess I can kiss my weekends goodbye soon, if the things that I’ve heard are true. Work till you get the work done, is the motto at this place. Not that it’s a bad motto but then, you need to set your boundaries and priorities and know where work ends and your own life starts. Unfortunately, at this place, work IS life. Well, my workload hasn’t gotten that bad yet but I’m sure it will come sooner or later.

Why am I getting myself into this situation again? Those are reasons which I will keep to myself for now. I just hope (and pray) I’ll be able to endure the kinds of things (more like, horror stories) that may be thrown at me in time to come.

How do some people do it?? Day in, day out… year after year after year… all that type of abuse hurling at them. I really salute them.

I must start thinking about being self-employed. I really cannot imagine myself working in this type of environment or working for an organization for the rest of my life. I need to be self-employed!! Gotta start thinking NOW.

~~~~~

Been using the LRT to get to work these days. One thing really amazing I found out in my recent LRT experience is that Malaysians actually QUEUE UP!!!!! And very orderly too! No pushing or rushing even though it’s rush hour and ppl are trying to get to work on time! It’s just so freaking amazing, compared to 5 years ago, when I used to use the LRT. Back then, ppl couldn’t bothered to queue.

But apparently, this amazing phenomenon only happens at the Putra LRT stations. According to my colleague, ppl don’t queue at other public transportation lines.

Other than that, the traffic is getting more horrendous every day. It seems like the earlier I leave for work, the more futile an attempt it is to try to beat the morning traffic. And the Putra LRT service really does not have the capacity to cater to the peak hour crowd coz the trains are just too small! Imagine, on Thursday, I had to wait for ELEVEN trains to pass before I managed to get on!! They were soooo packed that ppl had their faces literally smooshed onto the doors!!

Some serious re-work needs to be done with our public transportation system. But from the looks of it, I doubt that will happen because we will always have ppl who are more concerned about pocketing public funds for their own selfish use rather than for the good of the country. Malaysia boleh, ma! Bleh…

So that’s the story of my life right now. It’s a Saturday night and I’ve got to start preparing for work on Monday.

Yay, how exciting… (can’t you just feel my enthusiasm)